The Ball Popper Incident

I was in the shower when Caleb's chubby, 3-year old arm whipped open the shower curtain. He eyed me up and down and asked in an incredulous tone, "what are you doing?"
"I'm taking a shower," I replied as I rolled my eyes because we have this same conversation every time I shower.

Caleb then pulls forward his other arm. On this arm, shoved up past his elbow, is the 'ball popper' toy. The ball popper, when used properly, uses a small vacuum engine to suck plastic balls in one end and then shoot them out the top. The balls land in a collection tray, wind down to the bottom, and are sucked back in. This is how it's suppose to work, anyway. In reality, I have only ever seen children shove cars, blocks, and hamsters down the top and then get their arms stuck while trying to get the items back out.

After a few tugs I realized he was good and stuck. So, I wrapped a towel around myself and fetched the cooking oil. Back in the bathroom, I was lubricating Caleb's arm with the oil when Anderson burst through the door doing a wild rendition of the potty dance. He managed to get his pants down and the seat up in time. And, his aim was mostly acurate until he noticed what we are doing. "Twist your arm, Caleb. Pull, Caleb, pull!" he shouted as pee splattered all over the walls.

I realized, at that moment, that this was one of those defining moments in motherhood. Me: dripping wet, shampoo still in my hair, and a towel wrapped around my body; Caleb: lathered in canola oil, elbow deep in the ball popper; and Anderson: pants down, pee flying everywhere, calling out encouragement.

The arm came out and I finished my shower. And, I must admit to you all that it wasn't until now that I remembered that I still need to wipe up the pee. Oops! Oh well...I think we did pretty well.

Easter

My boys like to get the maximum potential out of every holiday. They started talking about Easter weeks ago. Anderson keeps modifying his list of things to ask the Easter bunny for. I often find myself reminding him of things such as, "You know you don't get as much for Easter as you do for Christmas, right?" and "the Easter Bunny's basket isn't that big.... he can't carry that much stuff with him." Unfortunately, Anderson is going to be bitterly disappointed when he finds his Easter basket filled with plastic eggs and candy rather than the parrot, Lego sets, and ferrets (ferrets?!!!!) he is expecting.

Caleb fondly refers to the mythical Easter figure as "That Easter Guy." Example: "Mom, let's call That Easter Guy and ask him to bring us a puppy."

Here is a picture of the boys with our neighbor girl. In January, they set up a lemonade stand in the front yard. I tried to explain that January is not the ideal time for selling lemonade, but they kept insisting. So, I gave in. Sometimes you have to choose your battles.

Cleanliness: an important value.

Caleb: "Mom, I need a boob on."
Me: "What?"
Caleb: "A boob. I need a boob on."
Me: "A....bib?"
Caleb: "Yeah, a bib. I need a bib on."

Don't worry, Dad. It's funny.

Chad was hunched down putting groceries away in some of our lower cabinets. He felt someone rubbing his back with a towel and turned around to find that it was Caleb. Caleb's pants and underwear were down around his ankles. Chad was quite alarmed (I would be too!).


"What are you doing?" Chad asked.

"I'm wiping pee off your back, Dad" says Caleb, in a matter of fact tone.

"What!?" exclaims Chad.

"Don't worry, dad. It's funny." replies Caleb.

Anderson and I laughed so hard that we almost peed our pants.



As I was lying down with Anderson the other night he said, "Mom, did you hear that noise?"

  "What noise?" I asked.

"I think it is the Valentine Bunny coming to give us something."

"It's the Easter Bunny," I told him, "no one comes for Valentines Day."

"They do too, mom. Maybe he just hasn't come for you because you haven't been good enough."

Nocturnal

Neither of my boys nap. Every once in a while, when one of them is having a meltdown, I will encourage them to go take a nap. A recent conversation with Anderson went like this:

Mom: "I need you to go lie down and rest."
Anderson (rubbing his red-rimmed eyes): "I'm not tired."
Mom: "That's okay... just go and lie down."
Anderson: "I can't sleep during the day, Mom. I am not nocturnal. You are just trying to make me nocturnal!"

Yes. Because I want him awake all night. Right.

Our hamsters, delivered by Santa, are nocturnal. They run on that little wheel of theirs All. Night. Long. They are now transferred from the boys room to the kitchen every night. Their names are Spike and Butch. These were originally some nicknames I gave the boys. I teased them that Spike and Butch were the names we really gave them when they were born. I am flattered that they transferred these names to the hamsters.

Spike the Nocturnal Hamster

A side note: I have embraced my true nature and now wear my hair curly. Behold me in my 'naturally curly' glory!:

Deep Thought of the Day

Anderson: "You should get a bigger purse, mom. Then you would have more money."

The simplicity of it all boggles my mind, folks. I have been doing things the wrong way. Now you all know what I want for Christmas.

My Friend, Jesus.

Among the flotsam and jetsam floating in our bathtub is a little action figure. He is a shepherd from a 'Lego-like' nativity set. As I listened to Caleb play in the bathtub, I realized that Caleb has named this little man "Jesus." Jesus has quite the adventures: he fights other action figures, rides on boats, and slides down the sides of the tub; he even wrestles the occasional shark. I haven't decided how I feel about this. On one hand, I am glad that Caleb believes that Jesus is a real person; on the other hand... should I allow the concept of Jesus to be mangled by a shark on a regular basis? Hmmmm. =)




Caleb and his friend, Jesus.